


Toxic

by 48eyesand32teeth1sharptongue



Category: Supernatural
Genre: 2019 reuploads, Abuse, Canon Divergent, Don't copy to another site, Eventual Abduction, Gaslighting, Hurt Sam, M/M, Sam is Jack's Dad, Season 13 spoilers, Season 14 Spoilers, Trans Sam Winchester, abandoned, and Lucifer is manipulative, bi sam winchester, triangulation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-20
Updated: 2020-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:41:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24833263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/48eyesand32teeth1sharptongue/pseuds/48eyesand32teeth1sharptongue
Summary: Lucifer comes back before season 13 ends, checks in with Jack, and stays on the down low, biding his time to get his son and his true vessel back under his thumb.All he has to do is make Jack doubt that Dean has the best of intentions, and promise to give Jack answers no one else will.
Relationships: Jack Kline & Sam Winchester, Lucifer/Sam Winchester
Kudos: 15





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> the moment Sam finds out what Lucifer's been up to and Jack goes "but Dean hurt you, didn't he?"
> 
> and Sam has to spill the beans on Lucifer he's just gonna be laughing hysterically at how out of control this has gotten and not in a good way

"See, Jack, I'm not mad at Sam, or you. See, you just follow Sam's lead. And Sam... He follows Dean. Personally, I don't think that's good for him. And I think, deep down, you know that too."

"Dean loves us-"

"Just... Hear me out, son. Please. I know you've seen what that's like. How many times has he seemed scared, hmm? How many times has he made excuses when Dean threatened you, or got angry with him? Or flinched and backed off when you can tell he's upset at Dean, or he thinks his brother is making a mistake, or being too controlling. He's too close to the situation, Jack. And you don't know all their history. Dean's tried to kill him before, you know?"

Jack looks horrified, and Lucifer oozes sympathy, patting his shoulder.

"Or I guess you didn't... Yeah, he did. Nearly broke his skull with a hammer and everything. And that's only the latest instance- he's threatened it often enough. Thing is, Sam still stayed after that, Jack, and hasn't left since the last time he tried and Dean has never forgiven him for it. So yeah, sometimes, I'm a little rough around the edges, too overprotective, and Sam gets... spooked. But I'm saving him from his brother. And you can help me. You can save Sam, and yourself. You don't need to make yourself into someone you're not to earn Dean's approval, to feel safe. Sam might think he has the situation under control, but he doesn't. And I'm not about to let it blow up in his face."


	2. Down Once More

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title a song from phantom of the opera

"We can't just not tell him." Dean sighs, nursing his beer without taking another swig. His foot keeps tapping against the floor absently, while Cas continues to pace, and Sam sits, hunched in his chair.

Sam takes a swig of whiskey. It's only 3:00 pm, which indicates his mood enough that no one is willing to push too hard.

"I know." Sam murmurs. His initial relief at leaving Lucifer behind had only been temporary, after all, since Sam knows better than anyone that it never sticks, and that the only safe Lucifer is one trapped in the deepest depths of an unbroken Cage, or one dead and buried. But Sam is not holding his breath on the latter, no matter how hard he wishes otherwise.

"I could tell him, if that's easier." Cas chimes in, looking at Sam in that too-still way that nonetheless makes his skin crawl, and then Cas seems to realize he'd gone full laser-focused angel and then starts back up the pacing just to ease the unwanted similarities.

"No-" Sam says too fast, then exhales, hand rubbing his mouth absently before he pushes the hair out of his eyes. "I mean, thank you, for offering. But this is something I need to talk to him about myself-"

"Sammy, don't take this the wrong way," Dean interrupts, placing a hand on his shoulder. Sam starts, then meets his eyes. "But if you can't talk about it with me... How are you going to tell the kid? I mean... I'm not saying you can't, I'm just saying... You shouldn't have to struggle with it, if it's going to make things worse... You don't have to do it alone, and you don't have to tell him everything-"

"I know, Dean, but that's exactly it. Honestly, I'm not sure it's the best play, right now. Jack is... He is taking it pretty hard, and even if we tell him that we... That I, lied, and even if he takes it well, considering he'll be mad at us- rightfully- for not being able to tell him..." Sam trails off, gripping the glass tighter, and then averts his eyes. "Even if we tell him, I don't know if that's going to be good for him, hearing everything else right now. I don't regret what we did for a second, Hell, we all know that, and I know we can't wait around forever."

Lucifer's too much of a lucky bastard for it to last, Sam knows all too well.

And Sam picks up where he left off in the hanging silence, grasping for the right words. "-ButÂ Jack is already in a difficult place, andÂ since he hasn't stoppedÂ hurting himself when he thinks we're not watching, when he thinks he's made a mistake or feeling responsible for things outside of his control. And I don't think I can tell him his father is a monster when he still feels... Connected. When he still doesn't know the scope of what was done, and what L... _He'd_ do if given the chance... I know it's selfish, and that it isn't sustainable in the long run, and I have to be the one to tell him, so he understands, so he doesn't take it badly. No offense, Dean, but you haven't exactly had a good track record with this kind of thing, and Cas... I know, I know you could help, and that you get it..."

Sam trails off again as he gets lost in the thick of it. There is precious little to explain, there, seeing as Cas has seen what Hell wrought firsthand, as penance for being instrumental in tearing the wall down when not in control of himself, thanks to interference from the Leviathans. Sam doesn't blame him, even if Cas still does.

And then Sam re-centers, heaves in another breath, determined as ever. "But if he's got to hear it from anyone, he's got to hear it from me. To... soften the blow, you know? And to make him understand why we didn't tell him from the onset. Just like he has to hear that it isn't his fault, or indicate anything about him, and that we love him and he's safe and that just because he wanted that connection and didn't know what Lucifer was... Jack needs to know this isn't on him, that it doesn't mean anything about him. And since he's still grieving... I just need some time, you know? To figure out how to say it right, say it so he doesn't feel betrayed or hurt or isolated, so he feels like he can still go to us and lean on us for support. And I need some time for myself to... To find the right words. To be there for him when he needs me. I can't just check out on him, I know that, and I... I need to do this, Dean. For Jack's sake and my own. Does that make sense?"

Sam looks at Dean, searching, eyes a little glassy, like he's searching for something but doesn't know what.

\--

Dean gives a nod, terse and tight, and squeezes Sam's hand when he sees Sam is reaching for the scar again.

He doesn't like it, but he'll yield on this one as much as he can, for Sam's sake.

However, he doesn't necessarily think there's much to be gained from total radio silence, and even if Sam is handling this on his terms, he might just tell Jack something to tide the brewing storm over. Nothing direct, nothing that's in Sam's wheelhouse. But if he's going to protect Sam, and protect the kid for Sam, then he can't let him take the burden on his shoulders alone. It's his job to protect him.

And if Jack was going to be angry, it might as well be at him, and not Sam. Dean knows he hasn't always been there for the kid, and knows there is still that unsettled, unexamined well of the fact that if push came to shove... That if the kid went bad, somewhere down the line, there's still that ugly thing deep inside Dean that he'll pretend isn't there, because he still would have taken that same shot he did if Sam was in danger, even if it's unthinkable that anything like would happen now that they know what Jack truly is like as a person.

Dean knows Jack won't hurt anyone on purpose. He's pretty gentle when not fighting monsters. And does he want to keep the kid safe and his nose clean and to support Sam and Cas in this? Yes. But not at their expense, and Jack, for all the ways he's proven himself, is still dangerous. He's still an emotionally unregulated child with powers that sometimes go out of control, and for all the ways the kid is not Lucifer, there's enough of a similarity that Dean needs to keep Sam out of the crossfire when this invariably blows up in his face, because even if Jack's feelings are hurt and it's all transient, Sam shouldn't have to be scared of echoes of a person that he still sometimes sees when Jack gets angry.

It is no one's fault but Lucifer's, but Dean still can't let that go unchecked. Sam is already dealing with being brought back, and being close to him again, and Dean will do anything to keep the one archangel Sam still can't get away from out of their lives, even if it's keeping what is inside Jack from being too close to the real thing.


	3. End of Days

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title a song by brown bird

Jack thinks about what Lucifer said, and tries to figure out where things don't quite match what he assumed.

Lucifer was said to be evil- and aside from what Cas and Dean had argued about, Jack wonders at what those evils exactly are, since it seems he's been blamed for things other people do while trapped in the Cage, even if Jack is sure Lucifer is not entirely innocent of his so-called crimes, corrupting people, as Lucifer even admitted as much.

He says he wants to be better. Jack understands making mistakes and wanting to fix them just fine.

So what does Jack know?

Lucifer brought Sam back from the dead when no one else could. That indicates he cares about Sam enough to help him, which is a point in his favor.

Otherwise...

Dean hated him, had thought that Lucifer had killed Mary before Jack had found her, and not even Lucifer bringing Sam back from the dead changed that- which meant he hated him more than Jack could probably contemplate, since he knows how much Dean doesn't want Sam dead. How much he just shut down once Sam was gone. How he was going to walk right back into that nest and get Sam's dead body back, even if killed him.

So Dean does care about Sam. Whether or not it's because he can't live without Sam and won't let him leave... That is left to be seen.

But unlike Dean, back when Jack was first learning about the world, Sam had been convinced Mary was alive on the reality just shy of theirs, that she wasn't dead, and hadn't said a word about Lucifer otherwise, (except for the time Dean and Sam and Donatello were arguing about genes and whether Jack took after Kelly, but considering how much Sam had been trying to protect and defend Jack at the time, he could've easily been molding his word choice to Dean's worldview because nothing else might work, and considering Sam had later confided that no one genes dictate their choices and who they are, later, so Jack doubts those arguments were genuine). Sam hasn't said much else about Lucifer since then. In fact, he's been very quiet about him and most things lately since they got back and left Lucifer behind, after Sam proclaimed that Michael killed him. Hasn't spoken up in groups. Has been distracted. But before, when Jack wanted to kill Michael, Sam and Lucifer agreed that following through was a bad idea. Both of them had the same idea, even if they had different tactics for getting Jack to listen to them, and had ultimately worked together to get him to see sense. Which means they aren't necessarily at odds. That they both care about Jack's welfare to teach him and guide him.

Which means Sam might not be at odds with Lucifer as much, even if he'd seemed... nervous and out of sorts, but if Lucifer's account was anything to go by, it's because interacting with Lucifer dredges things up for Sam since they were both trapped in Hell together.

Then again, Lucifer had also seemed... a little guarded when they had been in the same place. Like he's worried Jack would replace him, and like he's worried around Sam, since he's always watching him.

Which, if he is trying to protect him, and Sam has some kind of history that makes him wary of Lucifer or hesitant to engage due to Dean and whatever bad blood between him and Lucifer led to his Dad and Father being trapped in Hell together, then that makes sense that Lucifer would be reticent and not push anything. Even if there had seemed to be some kind of unspoken words between them that Jack doesn't quite know how to read.

Deep down, Jack knows his best bet is just asking Sam directly- but Lucifer had said that would only be a dead end due to how much Sam has been put through because of him and what Dean would do if he knew, and Jack has asked Sam enough questions to know when direct answers weren't always on the table, when Sam would get that faraway look and not be all there in the moment anymore. Lucifer had also said asking directly it would make Sam worry about what Dean would do or how'd he would react, or think about things that wouldn't help him because of whatever has happened in the past that makes Dean different around Lucifer and makes Sam shut down.

Which would make Sam anxious. And Jack doesn't want to make him anxious, or have Sam take the fall for him if Jack makes Dean angry by poking around. And Jack knows that if Sam's estimation of the situation is skewed due to the survival tactics Lucifer mentioned, then Sam might not realize if he's in too deep. (Provided Lucifer is being transparent about everything, which... So far, he hasn't said anything that has conflicted much with what Jack has lived or seen, so he doesn't really have a reason to lie, as far as Jack can tell.)

That, and Sam had seemed worried or sad once they got back from the other world. Like there was unfinished business he hadn't had a chance to deal with...

And if he thought Lucifer was dead, and that had sparked those feelings, then poking around too much might make things worse for Sam, and Jack doesn't want to hurt him, either.

And with all that on the table, that leaves another option, which is asking his other father, Castiel, who definitely has opinions or at least some idea of what has happened, even if he hasn't spilled Sam and Dean's past secrets as to not violate their privacy, preferring to let Jack ask himself.Â 

And Jack knows Castiel expresses caution and dislike of Lucifer, and seems convinced he's a bad influence, but didn't speak of any concrete examples of whatever evils might be the reason he wants to keep Jack at arms length from Lucifer himself. So that could be based on hearsay, or on Dean's opinion of Lucifer based on their shared history, or could be based on the angels' account of Lucifer, which Jack has been told are propaganda. (Jack knows angels lie, and knows they can be cruel, so that doesn't seem a stretch, either, and checks out from what he knows of the host aside from Castiel.)

Or maybe Castiel blames Lucifer for what happened to Sam or what led to him being trapped in Hell, even if it wasn't anyone's fault. That would explain the dislike easily, considering Cas wouldn't tell Jack about things Sam wants to keep private, and mentioning it would be violating that trust, which means Castiel might be resorting to generalizations to avoid telling things about Sam he has not mentioned to Jack for personal reasons. (Jack understands keeping secrets, sometimes, seeing as Sam has said not everyone needs to know everything, that you are allowed to keep some things to yourself- that Jack doesn't have to make himself uncomfortable or vulnerable if he doesn't feel like sharing something, if it's something that is his and something about himself he wants to protect, or just if it's something that is his alone, and doesn't need any intrusions unless he feels like it's something he wants to share.)

And if that theory holds true, then perhaps Castiel took Dean's side in whatever occurred due to that assumption, and that is what makes him blind to what Dean does to make Sam unhappy, if Lucifer's suggestions have merit.

Jack could also ask Mary, but if he's being completely honest, he's pretty sure Mary doesn't really know what happened to Sam and Dean before he was born since she's been dead until recently, which would defeat the purpose. Jack is also pretty sure she doesn't know Sam and Dean's own history or be inclined to think of them at odds, seeing as they are both her sons and she might assume everything is fine since they have been doing this together for a while, and seeing as she can be distant from them, too, which means she might not know why Cas and Dean remain against Lucifer, although Jack could ask her about being trapped with Lucifer, or how she got trapped in the first place. (Lucifer had said it was an accident.)

That, and as much as Jack loves Mary and knows she loves him and her sons, she has done some things that have hurt them, that have been thoughtless. She's even mentioned how she's made mistakes when Jack was angry at himself, to explain to him that people screw up but they can make up for things by trying to do better. She said she worked with people who tortured Sam and how there is that gulf between them that is less present now, but still there because of how she didn't care enough to realize how her actions would impact him, because she didn't realize the extent of the damage and because she was too focused on her own failures and problems that she didn't see the damage until too late. So Jack doesn't entirely trust her judgement on things like this, even when she's purposely left some distance so Sam and Dean can interact with her on a level playing field and in a way that makes everyone feel like they have enough space without getting too close to hurt each other, from what Jack can tell through their interactions.

But what points the most in Lucifer's account of events is that Jack can see how Dean doesn't listen to Sam sometimes, or does things that Sam doesn't like or makes him jumpy, like breaking things or yelling too loud or barking orders or dismissing Sam's input, and when Sam doesn't agree to go along with his plans when it comes to big events, there's like a switch that flips and then they start fighting again.

So it seems like everything is okay until Sam disagrees. Which isn't okay, even if Sam holds his ground.

But Jack doesn't know how to ask Sam about that, any more than he knows how to ask Sam about the history he hasn't talked about. What makes him get quiet and sad or distant enough that sometimes Jack wonders why he pulls away. Adults don't always tell children things, Sam had said, not because they don't want to keep them in the dark, but because a parent's job is to protect their children, and children deserve to not have to carry the weight of the adults' world. Jack doesn't like it, doesn't like being left out or treated like a child... But he understands why Sam does what he does, and knows Sam tries to treat him as an adult and to confide in him with responsibilities provided they don't burden Jack with things that aren't fair to him, from Sam's perspective, due to his role as his Dad.

And Jack knows enough. Knows how people thought Sam was evil, once. How people treated him badly. How he somehow was saved from whatever horrible things happened.

Jack knows he was- Sam had said as much, when trying to prove to Jack that he was good- but Sam never talked about details. He had explained that had been one of those personal things you don't have to confide, and one of those parent things that Jack got used to, no matter how much Jack wanted Sam to open up, even if he's not sure if Sam even knows how. But he knows it's different, because Jack is his son, and that Sam would tell him as much to give him an answer and the truth, even if it doesn't tell Jack everything because it is not all his to know.

But even so, Jack doesn't want to let Dean in on the fact he knows something is wrong, nor does he want to be so direct that he hurts Sam by not knowing enough to even ask the right questions. So Jack does have a plan. He just has to be smart about what he asks and how he asks it, and see how Sam and Dean and Cas all respond.

And it shouldn't be too hard... There's a lot of things when it comes to Jack that they disagree about, when it comes to teaching him or letting him do things. Watching those reactions... Figuring out what really is going on behind the scenes...

Jack should be able to sleuth this out on his own merits. It's like working a case, a little, only with his family as the people he has to protect and investigate. And he knows them well enough to know when they are holding back, or lying, or to read their moods.

Jack can do this. All he has to do is listen and pay attention.

And then he can fix things and make sure Sam is okay and that nothing hurts them going forward, because he'll know who to trust.


	4. Message Man

"Look, I think we can both agree two Michaels is one Michael too many. And since they've been so interested in you, we need to take precautions. And we have to make sure they can't wreak revenge on Sammy, either."

\--

"You think that Sam wanted to lock you in that box, Jack? We both know he didn't. But he went along with Dean anyway. Now do you understand? He isn't capable of being objective about the situation. We can fix that."


	5. Time Warp

"Hey," Lucifer crouches down slightly and cups Jack's face. "Why don't I show you?"

Jack tilts his head. "Show me?"

"Yeah. We can time travel, see for ourselves just what Dean has done."

"But if you know what happened already, why-" Jack starts, but Lucifer cuts him off, hand on his shoulder, looking more grave than Jack has seen him before.

"Because I don't feel comfortable letting you goÂ into this blind, son. You need to see for yourself firsthand how bad things can get, and how Sam doesn't know how to get out anymore because of it-"

_It's Jack_ , but Jack lets his annoyance slide doesn't correct him, and he keeps listening because there are more important things that Lucifer not following Jack's preferences for being talked to, especially since Jack just chalks it up to Lucifer missing him or feeling like he hasn't been able to be a father. Besides, Sam's welfare matters more than childish things Jack should know better than to let bother him.

"-So if we want to keep Sam safe, I think you should see firsthand what to look out for. What he's dealt with." Lucifer adds, and that does make Jack step backwards a little.

"Isn't that invasive?" Jack asks, startling his eyes upwards. Analyzing Lucifer's face to try and figure out why he sounds both sympathetic but also a little too... intense.

Lucifer nods. "Well, yes. But it's not as if we're changing the past. And we're doing it to protect Sam now, which takes precedence. Besides, he'd want you to be able to protect yourself. How can you do that if you don't know what to look out for?"

Lucifer waits a tic, palms out, and adds, softer now, "It's your choice, son. I'll respect whatever you think is best. But if I didn't think this would help, I wouldn't have suggested it. I only want what's best for you, and to adequately prepare you for what can go wrong if Dean finds out we're trying to rescue Sam from him."

Jack mulls his words over. Lucifer is very eager, but he's backed off, given him space.

Lucifer may not entirely be nice, but he does answer Jack's questions, and his is very patient, even if sometimes he gets enthusiastic and turns a little pushy. So his heart seems to be in the right place. That, and the fact Castiel and Dean don't like him, but Sam has kept mum on the subject save for saying, " _That's not really what he does_." When it comes to protecting people, and seeing as that's the only time Jack and him had ever discussed his birth father, alone, well...

Sam would have said more if Lucifer was really dangerous, wouldn't he? He would have told Jack what to worry about, to keep him safe, because Sam doesn't keep secrets when Jack asks directly, he just doesn't seem comfortable with things all the time and there's all this history Sam seems to drown in that he maintains his brother saved him from, but Jack isn't so sure, after talking with his father.

And Jack needs to keep his Dad safe and happy. That's one thing he knows he is sure about.

So if Dean made Sam scared of Lucifer, and that's why Sam doesn't think Lucifer can protect him or doesn't talk about it at all, then it makes sense Sam wouldn't want to talk about it.

That, and there's other things that just don't add up.

If Jack was thought to be evil from his Father due to Dean's estimation of him, but Sam didn't think Jack was evil just for being born, and Cas only thought Lucifer was evil due to lies and Dean's dislike if Cas has been unable to see Sam is in danger because he makes excuses for Dean or doesn't see that Dean is hurting Sam, then it's not a far stretch to think Cas made a mistake.

Cas has said he's been mistaken many times. He says it's part of learning to be better.

And Jack can understand that.

Just as he understands how easy it can be to be scared of Dean, and to want him to like you, anyway, and these things were not mutually exclusive. Being liked meant you were safe, and being liked meant he could stay with Sam who Jack doesn't want to be parted from, because Sam loves him and wants what's best for him and always make Jack feel like things are going to be okay. That he can protect him.

Survival instincts, and not wanting to be separated from Sam, since Sam sticks with Dean and Jack has understood this as long as he's been alive, they always stick together- maybe, subconsciously, that's why Jack hasn't been able to reconcile all the different feelings.

And maybe that's why Jack hasn't wanted to rock the boat, because Jack knows Sam loves him and if Jack asked him to leave...

Jack isn't sure what would happen. Jack isn't sure because Sam's never left while he's been around, and even when Sam is angry or scared he hasn't taken Jack away.

Maybe he doesn't think there's a danger.

Or maybe he thinks the danger is too great and the only way to keep Jack safe is to make sure Dean feels like he's in control.

But if Jack wants to be responsible, wants to grow up and be like Sam...

Then maybe he can start by saving him, too, just like Sam saved Jack and called him family.


	6. Devil Take the Hindmost

There's a sinking feeling in Sam's gut as he tries to figure out a way to escort Jack out of here. Escape routes. Ways to convince Jack that they are striking out on their own and safe from angels and demons and whoever else Jack is convinced is after them.

Especially because Sam has enough sense to realize that Jack's "friend" can only be working for one person, since there's precious few that would be feeding him all this information, and especially if the agenda was to convince Jack Sam is in danger and that both Cas and Dean cannot be trusted.

Sam tries to center himself. Tries to take a breath and jam open the window to the bathroom to get down the fire escape-

That is, until sometime tackles him from behind, too fast to follow, and arms wrap around Sam's midsection, so tight he can't move or breath without it feeling like his ribs are going to bruise, and even with all the expertise in the world and automatic response to get his assailant off, Sam knows a losing battle because he knows the cold chill of that grip all too well.

That, and Sam can see the monster in the mirror, blue eyes and crooked smile and all, face nestled into his neck, barely a speck of movement in his peripheral vision.

"Hey, Sammy. Long time no see. You enjoy your brief vacation without me?"

"Don't touch me-" Sam hisses, struggling more and half-trying to make a spectacle of it so Lucifer doesn't notice his attemptÂ to cut his pointer finger on the jagged pipe of the sink, tetanus be damned, to draw the fastest banishing sigil on the edge of the porcelain he can muster.

Lucifer notices anyway, just as he knows most of the struggle is just autopilot, a learned response that Sam wouldn't be unlearning any time soon.

Doesn't stop him fromÂ clamping his hand over Sam's fingers, crushing them, too tight, and Sam tries to pull away from the teeth grazing the edge of his ear.

"Oh, don't be like that. You're so hot and cold, kiddo. I'd almost be offended if I didn't know how much of a tease you like to be."

**I'll shred you into fucking pieces.**

_Now that's a classic, but even I can admit evisceration and flaying gets a little stale after a while. We could spice things up, you know. Reignite the old flame some other way._

Sam ignores that. There's no other real option when there's no winning this fight with brute strength. All he has is his dignity, and his rage, and the adrenaline of a fear that has never quite left him since Lucifer got his hooks in.

"What do you want-" Sam's voice cracks despite himself. "What did you do to Jack-"

Lucifer shushes him, and too much sense memory takes over with a cold hand straying too close to Sam's fly, and Sam shuts up on autopilot until he remembers he doesn't have to listen to a fucking thing Lucifer says, all the other threats notwithstanding.

"I didn't do anything to him, Sammy. Don't be hysterical. He just listened to my side of the story and saw sense. Saw how you were a man trapped in an untenable situation. He just wanted to help, and who was I to deny him?"

**Bullshit. What do you really get out of this, outside of hurting me, outside of using me as bait to ruin Jack's life once he realizes you aren't what you pretend to be-** Sam's mutinous mind adds.

_Oh ye of little faith. I do want what's best for him, Sammy. I do. And part of that is having a stable home life, something Dean and Cassie are not quite qualified to provide. And contrary to what our fraught history may suggest, I do want what's best for you, too. Jack's good at that, you know. Helping me reflect, and re-assess my, mm,_ And Lucifer kisses Sam's neck and Sam full-body flinches, forgets how to speak or think or breathe with the claustrophobic nightmare that never seemed to truly end. _Priorities._

"IÂ can't savor this? Us. Together again. You know, I had given up for a little while, thought it was a lost cause, but I just can't quit you-"

"Answer the fucking question." Sam snarls.

**Don't play games. You don't need me, and-**

_So dramatic. And you're right. I might not need you. But I still want you. That's got to count for something, right?_

"Okay, fine, you got me.Â Sure, I said I didn't need you as a vessel. And I don't. But let's not kid ourselves. Your body is the gift that keeps on giving. Speaking of-" And too-cold hands make good on their threat, sliding under Sam's waistband, thumbing the fly open while Lucifer rolls with Sam's attempt to squirm away, rocking up against him, "Think you can still get it up for me?"

\--

"Kelly was a little bit of rebound, but as good a kisser as she was, you are miles out of her league. Chemistry. Can never beat the real thing."

\--

**The moment Jack finds out what you really are, it's over. So just tell me how you think this is going to go when we both know he'll see right through you-**

"It's simple. See, junior is currently under the impressionÂ that we're star-crossed lovers kept apart by a disapproving family, and as far as I'm concerned, that's close enough of an approximation. You are _my_ bitch, after all, and kids don't always grasp the careful nuance of adult relationships. And I may have mentioned that you're brainwashed, so even if you did say your side of things, I doubt he'll believe you when he doesn't think you are able to make objective decisions at the moment, particularly when he is convinced that darling Castiel is Dean's unwitting accomplice to your unfortunateÂ circumstances, so I don't think you'll get help from that quarter. Kid is adamant that you heal and don't get sucked back into any Stockholm-syndrome type scenarios, seeing how many times big brother has tried to kill you and you let him run wild anyway."

**Like you're one to talk.**

_Oh, but I always let you know what you were in for, Sam. It's notÂ the same, not when you were promised to me from the very apex of creation. Can't fight what written in the stars after all the blood you drew and drank to let me free._

"You really think he's gonna fall for that?" Sam says instead. He's shaking and sweaty and dizzy, but he's still clawing at Lucifer's grip, still fighting a fight if only to prove to himself he can.

Lucifer flashes a quick grin, and flips Sam around so that the sink is pressing into his back, nestling between his legs. Too close. Too familiar.

"You tell me, bunk buddy. He's been remarkably understanding so far. And I'm sure you remember how persuasive I can be?"

\--

"Not to mention you took to parenthood like a fish to water. And don't get me wrong, I'd never break up a happy family. I only resent being left out, and being kept from what is mine. That includes you, you know that. But hey, if you weren't such an involved parent, I would admit I wouldn't have seen the forest for the trees. How much you missed us. Because I know you did, Sam, because who other than a loyal bitch would choose to raise the son of someone who reminds them of so much... history."

"You-"

"Sam, you practically handed me an open invitation to waltz right back in the moment you took my son into your care. How else am I supposed to take such a gesture, hmm?"

\--

"I hate to burst your bubble, but Jack did give me a little kick of his power to verify that my account was true and faithful to your history. Time travel is a delicate process, and I would hate to have anything interfere with my ability to parent Jack effectively. And you could get all desperate,Â could pray to him to try and mount a rescue, but then there's that whole awkward situation of him walking in on us like this, something I'm sure you we can both agree is inappropriate, and even if he does decide to try and fly you away, I can and will follow, and then I will be forced to... educate Jack on some of the finer details of this arrangement. You following, Sammy? And yeah,Â you could try to tell him your side of things. But if this goes south, well, you said it yourself. There are other ways to make this custody situation work. So. You can choose to make this pleasant," And Sam grits and bares his teeth at the mere idea, as Lucifer's voice sings, "Turn that frown upside-down," And pinches Sam's cheek, then gives it a pat, "Or, you know, be all doom-and-gloom and take the usual hard way where I win and you lose no matter what option you pick. Up to you. I'm game for either. But you might want to consider that, uh, Michael's flying out and about. Seeing the sights. And you pissed him off, Sammy. You pissed him off more than I ever did, and that's saying something. And once he's done dealing with his doppelganger, well... Jack is very amped up to make sure another apocalypse doesn't come to pass, and I'm inclined to help him follow his dreams. Might mean there's some collateral damage in the crossfire, but if you want Dean and Cassie to make it out unscathed, I'd consider staying on my good side. I did protect you, after all. You remember those days, when your soul was a bright putty in my hands and I kept it from burning away, kept Michael from tearing it to shreds?"

A hand skitters too close to Sam's chest, slips under the fabric of his skirt and up his ribcage-

_Kept it nice and snug and tight enough for my grace to slide inside and make you feel sublime-_

**No! Get the fuck off of me!**

"Oh, come on, Sam. You don't get to play innocent here. We both know much you missed this. How much you are a glutton for punishment. And what kind of angel could turn you down?" And then Lucifer's voice goes low, a rumble in his chest, teasing out the edges of his true voice enough to make Sam close his eyes and try to pretend he is anywhere but here. "You don't get to steal what's mine, babe. You won't steal my son from me. And since you've been so keen on being involved in his upbringing, well, who am I to deny you this, when we both know who you truly belong to. Hmm?"


	7. Mad World

"Jack, Lucifer has hurt me more than anyone. He's tortured me for years, and he's half the reason all the things happened to us in the first place, and he doesn't feel a single scrap of remorse. He would've burned the world and thought it kind. He's a monster, and a liar, and I am not going to let him anywhere near either of us if I can help it."

\--  
And Jack sees Sam get angry in a way he's never seen before.

"You are the absolute worst thing to ever happen to me."

\--  
"I'm going to end this once and for all." Sam snarls, straining against Lucifer's grip.

\--

"You were protecting me? You? You are the last person able to claim anything like that!"


End file.
